Teagan Rose

Dave and I had been planning a family since we got together, I already had a Daughter from a previous relationship, Shannon who Dave took on as his own, we were married in March 2010 and I was pregnant at that time, but unfortunately miscarried at 12 weeks, just 2 weeks later.  We went on to have Maddison in Aug 2011 and Teagan in Nov 2014.

I had a problem free pregnancy with Teagan and planned a home birth with a birthing pool and had spent the second half of my pregnancy preparing, I went to aquanatal yoga and read numerous books, websites, blogs etc. in addition to all the planning with my midwife. There were no concerns during my pregnancy and I had stayed healthy and active throughout.

My due date was 20th Nov 2014, which came and went (my first 2 daughters were almost 2 weeks late so I wasn't expecting this baby to come any earlier!) But Teagan decided to make an appearance at 3.19am on Sunday 23rd Nov. The labour was quick and although I did get to use the pool the midwife was still on route when Teagan arrived, she was delivered by her Dad and our neighbour Debbie was called in by Shannon, 16yrs old to help!

The midwife arrived around 10 minutes after delivery followed by 3 paramedics and another midwife, it was decided that we be transferred to York hospital as there were concerns around Teagan's oxygen levels and her breathing.

I held Teagan in the ambulance all the way to York hospital and didn't put her down once even though my arms were aching like mad! I blamed myself and thought it was because of the decisions I had made to have her at home in the pool that had made her poorly...

How wrong I was. We spent 6 hours at York hospital in which time Teagan was in the special care unit, away from us. When we finally got to see our beautiful bundle of joy she was on a ventilator and covered in wires and tubes hooked up to machines, it was at this point we were told that Teagan was to be transferred to Leeds General Infirmary Neonatal Intensive Care Unit and we had to make our own way there, we weren't to follow the ambulance incase they had to pull over, it would cause us too much distress (as if we could feel any worse)

We spent the next 2 days on the neonatal ICU at LGI having all sorts of tests done with some positive results and on Monday evening we were confident that the worst case senario was that we would be bringing up a blind Daughter who may have some mobility issues, we felt confident we could cope with that but knew there was a long road ahead of us and wondered if we'd be here over Christmas.

Then on Tuesday 25th Nov our world shattered when we were given the devastating news, some blood tests had revealed Teagan had Patau Syndrome, Trisomy 13, an extra chromosome 13 in every cell in her body which had a life expectancy of 5-7 days, we were floored, it was not what we were expecting to hear at all, how could this be happening when we had no indication of any issues at all during our pregnancy? But there was no mistake, her diagnosis was final and all testing stopped, we were now told there was nothing more the Drs. would do and unless Teagan breathed on her own once off the ventilator then they would not treat her or offer any operations as they said her fragile body would not cope. We were in so much shock and couldn't take it in, all we wanted was to be with her and hold her close, give her all our love.

After her diagnosis we were asked if we wanted to consider taking Teagan to Martin House Children's Hospice, a doctor from the hospice came to visit us at the LGI and told us all about what the care they could provide and the help and support on offer for us as a family. We decided to go with Teagan on Thursday 27th Nov and spend as much time as we had with her as a family.

We had 6 beautiful hours with Teagan, we took her for a walk in her pram, we were visited by family and Teagan was surrounded by love and laughter, her Sisters Shannon 16, and Maddison 3 came and help her, sang to her and loved on her as much as they possibly could. As the day drew to a close Teagan was too tired to go on and passed away in my arms that evening at 7.50pm with her Dad and big sister Shannon by our side.

She is missed every single day, but if asked we would do it all again, we feel blessed to have had Teagan in our lives, for the precious memories and for all she taught us about unconditional, pure love. We include her in all we do and she now also has a brother, Jackson who was born in May 2017 who will learn about his big Sister in the stars and all she gave us in her short time on the Earth.

Johanne. Mummy to Shannon, Maddison, Teagan Rose and Jackson x